How To Survive Valentine’s Single

It is that time of year again, that dreaded “I’m going to be #foreveralone” time of year, that is unless you have a Bae then it’s that “I love you so much it hurts” time of year. Oh, go get a room Mary! Now if I was still with “He-who-shall-not-be-named” I wouldn’t give a sh*t about Mary! See how that escalated fast? People in relationships forget about us singletons, but why would they remember us? They’re going to be having wild sex in between meals for the day. Well, that’s what I’d be doing! I didn’t get the 14th off work to look at him.

Valentine’s can seem daunting for us single folk especially when couples seem to run the show, booking out your favourite restaurant and you have to order a meal deal for one instead. Since becoming single, all my independent woman training has led up to this point. I’m not going to lie and tell you I have been living for it because I have in me arse! This being my first Valentine’s single in five years, I’m freaking out so I’m writing this blog for me just as much as I’m writing it for you and surprisingly I’m feeling a lot better about V-day now. (Damn I’m good).

I wouldn’t want to spend it with him anyway #Image

So girls relax, Tinderella is here to help you survive Valentine’s Day and live to see the 15th of February without tears because I’m a mad bitch and I know the suss. You’ll be grand!

Grab Your Craziest Single Friend And Hit The Town!

We all have that one crazy single friend who doesn’t know the meaning of the word “No”.

Yes her, that’s the pal you should ring up and hit the town with this V-day.

Who better to show you the best spots Dublin has to offer than the session moth herself?

I mean what even is Valentines’s anyway? Galentine’s is what it’s all about, if you ask me us singletons should feel bad for those in a relationship, that’s the real trauma!

So, get dolled up to the nines, wear the highest shoes you can walk in, bat those eyelashes and flick that hair.

Make “slut drop” your middle name(s), get your weekly dose of dancing and stay out till the cows come home because – time is no issue when your single.

Avoid Braggers

Avoid braggers at all cost, all they want to do is rain on your single parade.

Let’s face it, they are only dying to brag about how fab their boyfriend is and how he whizzed her away in a horse and carriage to give her a 20-inch, love-heart shaped box of chocolates.

“Oh, great Mary” – Really, we DGAF but we’ll let her have her moment.

We both know Mary and her bae hated each other last week, so who is the real winner here?

You my dear, because you ain’t got time for having a yo-yo relationship.

Do not, I repeat, do not go out with a couple.

It might seem like a good idea at the time when your girlfriend invites you out with her and her valentine to be nice because she knows you’re #foreveralone, but don’t bother thinking twice about it.

You may have been bessie mates since you were four but this will end in tears (for you) when they’re locking lips on the taxi ride home, and you’re just looking out the window asking “what is my life?”

Before you know it, she’ll turn into a Mary and life’s to short for more than one of them!

There are other options other than being a third wheel, find that crazy single friend.

Be Your Independent Woman Self

Why not have a night in to yourself?

Being alone with pizza is better than being alone. Just think of the damage you could do! You can eat the whole thing, girl!

“Sharing is caring” is not a phrase that will be coming out of your mouth.

You can watch all the cheesiest chick flicks you like and you don’t have to worry about bae throwing a strop.

You don’t have to shave ANYWHERE and you can lounge around in nothing but your dressing gown eating out of a tub of ice cream.

This all sounds like music to our ears, so while all those coupled up girls are running around like headless chickens looking for a last minute present, you can be stress free, focusing on yourself – bliss.

You. Are. Not. Alone.

Tinder – it does exactly what it says on the tin, all you have to do is pop on to Tinder to see there are millions of single people out there just waiting for your hand in marriage, or just a drink – either way they are all single.

Now, we’re not telling you to spend your Valentines curled up on the couch swiping left and right, but just downloading the app makes you realise it’s not the end of the world.

There are plenty of fish in the sea and when you get a match it gives you a nice confidence boost – yes, someone likes your face, congratulations!

The odds of you being the only single person left in the world and destined to be a spinster for all of eternity are slim – so calm down, you’re not alone.

No need to have “All by myself” on repeat and wrecking your next door neighbors love session even though we know they deserve it – Who do they think they are making love on Valentine’s? Pure cheek!

Treat Yo Self!

Girl, the only reason you should be crying this Valentine’s is with happiness.If you’re going to cry it should be “happy” tears that fall from your eyes, because this year you don’t have to spend loads of money on the perfect present for Bae just to find out he doesn’t even know you at all and kept it safe with chocolates from Lidl.

Yes, this did happen to me. Wasn’t I only dropping hints all over the shop for orange roses and didn’t he leave it last minute as he always did and ran to Lidl to get me a card and chocolates. Like, the gas part was they sold orange roses there, but did he care, NO! Why I didn’t dump him I’ll never know.

Now I am rolling around in the extra cash I’m not spending on his greedy ass!

So, just think, now you have all this extra cash that you can spend on whatever you like. New shoes perhaps? A Pandora ring to yourself from yourself, why not? A Domino’s meal deal for four, go wild.

Make A Plan Of Action!

So whether you’re sitting around with your mates drinking your sorrows, it is important to make a plan of action.

You don’t want V-day to sneak up on you and kick you in the ass.

Don’t be that girl left freaking out ringing everyone you know in hopes they will spend the day with you so you’re not alone, head-deep in a tub of Ben & Jerry’s.

Be organised and make a plan in advance so you can enjoy V-day for what it is and make the most of it, single and all.

Own It!

The most attractive thing you can do is own your singleness.

Tell yourself – I am single because I know my worth and will not settle for anything less.

By owning your singleness you will attract the right people by giving off your happy-go-lucky vibes.

It’s easy to think that Valentine’s is awful because you have constant cheesy reminders all around you of what you don’t have – but really it’s just another Hallmark holiday.

You’re free to do what you want, when you want, with whom you want and flirt the flipping day lights out of them.

Who knows, by getting out and owning your status you might be leaving it behind and bagging yourself the biggest ride of your life, that has his own car, house and is rich. (A girl can dream). The main thing is though YOU WILL BE GRAND!

Until next week

Tinderella

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