The Reality Of My Galentine’s Was Nothing Like My Expectations!

So as you all know it was my first Valentine’s single in five years and blah blah blah, you know the drill. Well, I’m sure you’re all wondering how I got on, seeing as I wrote two blogs in a row of “How to survive Valentine’s single” and “Forget V-day it’s all about G-day.” Now by writing these blogs not only did I pump myself up and get myself in the mindset of being single on the day of “love” but I also gave myself super  high expectations. Expectations so high that my reality is just plain gas.

Expectations:

Meet up with my group of single girls (all my friends are full on taken so I don’t know where I was going with that idea in the first place) and hit the town to where there would be nothing but singletons as far as the eye can see. A moss pit of handsome single men, who would be on the lookout for a single gal like me. We would head to Capital for pre drinks, where I would be hit on by so many single men that I would think to myself “I could set up a side job of being a nonsexual call girl.”

After that spark of confidence, the girls and I would hit up Coppers, naturally. To where we would do numerous shots and be the mad single bitches that we are. After fully intoxicating ourselves we would dance on top of tables and get told repeatedly to get down by the bouncer. Then Lauren would lob the gob with him to shut him up, which we all would appreciate. (‘Atta girl Lauren!)

Image of me on the bar!

Clearly lads would be all over us like, it’s Valentine’s and we’re single and so are they, so naturally we would lock lips and exchange phone numbers to where we would ghost them and never see them again. Let’s be real you wouldn’t want to give a night like that up for some Coppers wear.

Then we would all get a taxi home together before stopping off and getting a pizza for the journey home. We would always talk about our epic single Galentine’s and it would work its way into our best woman speeches throughout the group.

Reality:

Met up with one single friend that brought along her single friend (single people are so scarce) and we went to Capital because cocktails were two for seven euro and little did we know that was the closest thing to cock we were getting that night. When we arrived the place was covered in couples, I’m not going to lie but I was shocked. There was so many couples that you would swear it was Valentine’s or something.

There were some couples that must have been on a first date because the awkwardness was making me even feel awkward for them. Then some couples were clearly just newly in a relationship because you could have literally cut the sexual tension with a rasher, I full on wanted what they were having, or were going to have or just had in the jacks five minutes ago, let’s be real. Then there were couples that have been together years and couldn’t string a sentence between them , but just sat there looking at the new couples day dreaming of happier times and for the other part they were on there phone doing one of three things…

One: on social media telling the world of how much fun they were having and bae is the best bf ever (even though I can say otherwise).

Two: scrolling through their newsfeed hoping something pops up that will spark conversation or…

Three: texting someone they shouldn’t be! In the list of all these couples there was us three girls just looking at them.

Like we were full on stalking all of them otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to elaborate on all their different statuses. We all agreed we were happy being single and being out with ex-bae was the last thing we would want to do, but still, that didn’t stop us from talking about them. For practically the whole night.

Are you happy you? Does that make you flipping happy babe?

Yes that is right my Galentine’s was spent talking about “He-who-shall-not-be-named” And just a sprinkle of previous tinder dates to mix things up a bit. Overall it was all mainly about boys. Wdf…?

Can woman not just go out and not talk about boys?

Was it being out for the first time single on Valentine’s that brought it on?

Did we all just need a good rant?

Do girls just naturally talk about boys in general?

You all know my expectations, so having “He-who-shall-not-be-named” pass my lips numerous times was the last thing I had imagined would have happened, but there I was. Five cocktails later and it was time to call it a night…I know, wild. The truth is, it was never going to be a wild night because it was a flipping Tuesday. SAKE!

On leaving the club I refused to leave this night without kissing something and go to bed feeling empty and if that something was a large quarter pounder meal from McDonald’s then so be it! At least I can guarantee happiness at the end of it. So off I went with my single girlo to macky d’s, tipsily skipping away down the road to see Donald like he was Zac Effron.

With the first bite of that burger, I was right, it was happiness, I didn’t need a man, I had a burger. I know it sounds silly and cringe but Valentine’s is about love and being happy, well, I was happy and I loved and was loved and I didn’t need a man to feel those things. Just sharing the day with friends and eating a burger was enough.

No, I didn’t get the wear and no, I didn’t dance on tables but sure I can do that on any night out. Just because I didn’t do it on Valentine’s isn’t a big deal, the main thing is I wasn’t alone, I didn’t cry and I wasn’t wanting to be with “He-who-shall-not-be-named” and that in itself is progress and a successful night. I hope you all had a happy and successful Galantine’s too.

Until Next Week

Tinderella

X